Peter Family Guy Quotes

You just have to read the best quotes from Peter of ​​Family Guy. Peter is definitely the funniest character of the show. Here are his funny quips and remarks. Peter: ...Lois comes up to me wanting to know if she can get a job, and I was like: I got a job for you right here [points at his crotch]... this zippers been broken for weeks, Ive had to use a safety pin.Peter: NOOOO! Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids. Damn Longears, trying to take Easter away from Jesus. Anyway, what was that you were saying?Police Officer: Hey. Thats Against the law. Youre coming with me.Peter: [singing to the tune of U Cant Touch this] Ah ah ah. Cant Touch Me/ Cant Touch me/ Ja ja ja ja just like the bad guy/ from Lethal Weapon 2/ Ive got diplomatic Immunity/ so Hammer, you cant sue/ I can write graffiti even jay-walk in the streets/ I can Riot, loot, not give a hoot, and touch your sisters teat/ Cant touch me/ Cant touch me/Joe Swanson: What in gods name is he doing?Peter: Cant touch me.Cleveland: I believe its the worm.Peter: [still singing] Cant touch me/ STOP, Peter time/ Im a big shot, theres no doubt/ light a fire then pee it out/ Dont like it, kiss my rump/ Just for a minute, lets all do the bump/ Cant touch me/ Yeah, do the Peter Griffin Bump/ Cant touch me/ Im Presidential Peter/ Interns think Im hot/ Dont care if youre handicapped, Ill still park in your spot/ Ive been around the world/ from Hartford to Back Bay/ Its Peter, Go Peter, Im so Peter, Yo Peter, Lets see Regis rap this way/ Cant touch me.Peter: Listen Lois, I know youre a feminist and I think thats adorable, but this is grown-up time and Im the man.[Brian has just peed on a Supermarket floor.]Peter: Jeez Brian, where do you think you are, Payless?Peter: Wow, is that really the blood of Christ?Preacher: Yes, it is.Peter: Holy crap, that guy mustve been wasted 24 hours a day.Peter: Oh, and sorry about that comment earlier. I have that disease that makes you swear involuntarily. Sonofabitch. Sonofabitch. Sonofabitch. See?Peter: So if I accidentally walk through you, does that mean that weve, you know, done it?Ghost: Geez, whats with you and the gay jokes?Peter: Im looking fo r some toilet training books.Salesman: We have the popular everybody poops, or the less popular nobody poops but you.Peter: Well, you see, were catholic...Salesman: Ah, then youll want youre a naughty, naughty boy, and thats concentrated evil coming out the back of you.